Sometimes my patchwork heart aches so. So many pieces missing. So many scars and repairs. How do we go on? Sometimes, like last Friday, joy evaporates and is replaced with a rush of pain and then the ooze of black bilious anger that seeps out of every pore when I feel dread fear combined with…
Tag: illness
Presence
‘My father was in a coma for six weeks before he died,’ a man told me recently. This man also described how he sat with his father until the end. ‘It was the best thing I ever did,’ he said. He felt there was some intelligence that passed between them wordlessly as they spent time…
Scottish Grit
Both my parents were hospitalized with pneumonia just over a week ago. My mum came into the kitchen to make breakfast and almost immediately collapsed on the floor. When she came round, she asked my dad to call an ambulance. But when the medics arrived, they noticed that my dad was very ill too. He…
The Hero Complex
I think I have a bit of a hero complex. I want to dash in and rescue people. At the moment I want nothing more than to rescue my sister, Andrea, from cancer. I wonder does this savior urge stem from past lives? From what I can tell I was a bit of a swashbuckler…
The Art of Soothing
I’ve come to believe that the ability to self soothe is one of life’s great accomplishments, at least it is for me. Sometimes I am rubbish at it. Two nights ago I stayed up til 3 am, my brain like a hamster in a wheel churning away. But then I tuned into Abraham Hicks on Youtube,…
Only Connect
I love social media because it creates a web of connective tissue that runs back and forth between us like an elegant spiders web made up of seemingly lightweight strands – vacation snaps, silliness, inspired thoughts and polemic. We share fragments of our lives over great distances on invisible frequencies, and because our souls…
Burn Out
We are such strange and complex creatures. I can barely understand myself never mind anyone else. On one level I am having a wonderful staycation in New York – hang-gliding, roller disco, going to the beach, outdoor concerts and catching up with friends. But I also feel profoundly exhausted and burnt out. The word ‘burnt’…
When The Body Says No
Oh my goodness did my body put up a fight against coming back to New York. I was wracked with pains, hot flashes, headaches, intense itching all manner of mini plagues the minute I sat down on the plane back to New York. It was almost comic. ‘Alright,’ I said to myself. ‘I get the…
Soul Love Forever 