I’m preparing to scatter Laura’s ashes and say a final farewell to her incarnate form. It is odd, I feel unexpectedly sad about parting with her remains. Perhaps it is because this little box of rubble is all I have left of our human life together. Her beautiful physical presence left such a strong impression on me. I can still picture the curvaceous cello shape of her back, her smile like a big slice of watermelon that ran from ear to ear, those mischievous eyes full of playfulness and naughtiness. But more than that, I can still feel the imprint of her energy on mine. How it felt to be wrapped around her in bed at night, her ardent kisses, or the gentle pressure of her hand in mine.
I know her beautiful spirit is not contained in the little handmade paper box that holds her ashes. But it is all that remains of the bodily form that I adored and which I got to know as intimately as the geography of my own hand.