Laura – We are planning all these things that say I’m dying such as having the Visiting Nurse Services provide palliative care in our home and trying to decide whether to get married or not. I want to be linked to Lucie for eternity. We love each other so much. But I’m very sad and depressed that I feel like I’m dying. I sit on the couch and stare out the window all day wishing I had the energy to go outside. Today there was a beautiful snow storm. I would love it if Lucie and I could go tobogganing as we did in the past. But instead, I just watched from the 28th floor as the birds swoop around on the air currents outside. On sunday we sent John of God of Brazil a photo of me dressed in white clothing which is what they request. We also sent a description of my ailments and asked for a remote healing. Now we are praying and waiting for a miracle.