Kindness abounds.  Friends invite me on holiday to Palm Beach.  The neighbors keep a watchful eye on my 92-year-old dad. And after nearly nine months of flat lining emotionally or worse feeling desolate and sometimes lost since mum’s passing, it’s as if the power is beginning to flicker back on inside. And more than that. Now it is surging back.  And the surprise, as before, after losing Laura, is that I feel stronger – more myself than ever before.

It is an odd conundrum that on the other side of great loss lies increased strength and a renewed sense of joy.

According to Abraham Hicks the way it works is that the obliterating pain of loss challenges you to want things again; to want life to be better; to put new thoughts and energy and ideas into your life.  On the flip side of despair lies a door to greater happiness. Sort of the lower you go, the higher you bounce.

It is a basic premises of Tai Chi, the ancient Chinese energy art that I teach that to gather momentum for any movement, you must first go in the wrong direction gathering speed to swing back more powerfully.

And of course, there is something else.  Losing someone you love means a wormhole opens through to the other side.  And love reaches back to hold you up, to help you to move forward.  It amazes me daily but I can feel Laura and mum actively encouraging me, pointing things out and nudging me.  It’s like having not one but three torches to light the way forward now.