My dad wore one of my mum’s sweaters out to dinner last week. He’s not alone. We’ve all been delving into mum’s wardrobe since she passed. An old pair of mum’s black leather gloves is one of my most cherished possessions. ‘They’re falling apart,’ Dad said quizzically when I said I wanted to take them….
Tag: death
Premonitions
There are things we know without knowing how or why we know them. Call them soul messages or premonitions. I’ve had a few in recent years. The latest happened before my lovely mum passed in May. Eight days before she died, I had a premonition that this was the beginning of the end. Mum’s final…
Being There
‘Being there is everything in love, in life and in dying,’ – Elizabeth Kubler-Ross (founder of the US hospice movement)
Disembodied Grief
When mum died, I didn’t see her spirit leave her body as I did with Laura. But I was there by her side in her final hours. And ever since I have a weird disembodied feeling, as if I am not quite here. At first I thought it was a protective numbness. But now I…
Liquid Love
‘You are liquid love in human form.’ – Abraham Hicks Love and light were recurring themes at the recent Art of Dying conference in New York, where more than 30 professionals, who tend to the dying, deceased and the grieving, spoke about their experiences. Olivia Barham, a death midwife, told how when her mother died, she…
A Life Wish
Do I have a death wish? Quite the contrary. I just want to feel alive again. I nearly lost my own life 10 years ago and I lost Laura nearly four years ago. And so life is very precious to me. I want to feel my own essence, my own being very intensely. And so…
Three Years Ago
In a couple of hours, it will be exactly three years since Laura passed. Three years. It seems impossible she has been gone so long. But there is a beautiful symmetry at work. We were together, as a couple, for three years. And now after another three years the pain of her loss has ebbed…
A word from JK Rowling
To the well-organized mind, death is but the next great adventure – JK Rowling
Otto
Sweet Otto has gone. The only cat I ever loved. He was my sister’s cat and he seemed to know instinctively what I needed when I returned to England to grieve after Laura died (see post My New Love, 7 August 2014). He jumped (uninvited) into the hammock beside me and put his paws around…
Spring into Being..
A little snow and the first sprinkle of Spring flowers this week in Central Park; hellebores, forsythia, magnolias, daffodils and a froth of apple blossom. I love the arrival of spring. I can usually tell when it is about to happen because one little tree on the Great Lawn in Central Park is always the…
All The Light We Cannot See
I am in love with writer Anthony Doerr’s work. I can’t tell you how happy I am to finally find his books. When Laura was ill, I lost the desire to read fiction. It was such a surprise. I am a literature major who typically devours a handful of novels a month. But now I find…
Hello 2016!
Happy 2016! Judging by my local Goodwill, it is that time of year to create new space and energy in our lives by letting go of old stuff. Last weekend there was a mini Everest of donations blocking the entrance to the Goodwill. As I stood gawping at the door, more and more people arrived…
A Fond Farewell
And so it is…Laura’s body (or what remains of her beautiful body) is finally out to sea very near to this beautiful beach in the Dominican Republic. The night before, I slept with laura’s ashes in my arms and felt a great calm and an extraordinary sense of electricity in my chest. We also danced…
Divine Timing
A dear friend, surrounded by her family and loved ones, said goodbye to her beloved mom last week. As I stood graveside listening to the heart felt speeches, I felt like I was standing in a painting with all the beautiful fall colors daubed around us. But my heart skipped a beat as my friend…
When Does Spirit Leave The Body?
What if death isn’t the moment the heart stops? What if the dying person is still undergoing a vital transformation and needs more time, before being carted off to the morgue or crematorium? According to Dutch cardiologist Pim Van Lommel and British neurologist Peter Fenwick, who both spoke at the New York Open Center’s Art of…
Soul Love Forever 