I love to wear Laura’s old clothes, especially her wooly socks, scarves and a big blue cardigan that we bought together at Zadig and Voltaire (Laura had lovely taste). It’s a forget-me-not, but more than anything else it’s like being hugged by Laura. During her last weeks in hospital, I wore an enormous alpaca sweater…
Laying Low
Grief is like a rip-tide. It grabs you by surprise and pulls you under. There is no warning. Sunday was Laura and I’s 4th anniversary (of when we met). I was fine all day until about 5pm and then I just collapsed. I am still as weak as a limp lettuce today. All morning all…
Happy New Year!
Happy New Year! Last night my parents and I lit candles and raised a glass to all those we’ve loved and lost recently. It is quite a tally. My Aunt Ellen just lost her husband Art and her daughter Janet, my mum lost 3 brothers (David, Robert and Frank), my aunt Isabel lost her husband…
The Golden Ticket
The morning of New Year’s Eve 2010 I woke up super excited. I dreamt the night before I had won the lottery. I almost never played the lottery, so I bought $40 worth of tickets. The tickets were all duds. But New Year’s Eve 2010 was the day I first looked at online dating sites….
Knitting Without Borders
Every child needs a friend, even if that friend is simply a teddy bear. That was the basis for Knitting without Borders, created 2 years ago by my dear friend Loredana. She started the project after hearing how an African girl, orphaned by the AIDS epidemic and dying of AIDS herself, had asked to be…
Merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas everyone!! I flew into the UK last night. I was supposed to be on a 10 day Vipassana retreat, sitting in silence to feel and release what happened last year when Laura was admitted to hospital on Xmas Eve. On Christmas day 2013, the doctors told us she might only have a…
The Dance of Spirit
I think I just visited heaven. After a year of extraordinary other worldly adventures, it is still a shock to hear myself say that. I am a journalist, who prides herself on her investigative chops and my ability to sniff out the insincere, the fraudulent, the hidden in whatever is being presented. I am no…
Heaven on Earth
I saw a little piece of heaven last week and that glimpse will burn like an ember in my heart for the rest of my life. In a year of extraordinary adventures, this has to be the most awe-inspiring and weirdest thing I’ve done. I did a life between lives regression. Essentially I was hypnotized…
Let’s Dance
When we dance, our inner core shines through in a way we don’t normally see. Call it the James Cagney effect. People who look pretty solid or even ungainly can suddenly take flight when they step onto a dance floor. At the Jewish Center swing dance last weekend, I felt like Jane Austen as men…
New Wedding Clips
Two new clips of our wedding just before the service (my family in the UK took them via Skype). It is fun to see Laura chatting and joking. And in case you missed it last year, here’s our brief, but beautiful wedding…
Wedding Anniversary
Tomorrow is my favorite day of the year. It is Laura’s and my wedding anniversary. Over our three years together, we sang ‘A your Adorable’ almost every night to each other, making up our own silly words for each letter of the alphabet. The more bonkers the better. Laura jumped in first with ‘Marry Me’…
The Gift
We are the stars in the sky that came as a gift to you all, so you would not fear
The Arms of Love
I often wake in the morning now to find myself all wrapped up snuggly with my feet playing what Laura called ‘feetsies’, my arms gently wrapped around me, with hands against my cheeks and suffused with a deep soul warmth and joy. When this happens, I wonder if Laura’s spirit slipped into bed during the…
Soul Love Forever 