To steer by the light of the heart is the only choice for me now. It is both exhilarating and terrifying. To let go of thinking my way forward and instead find the path by what feels right, what resonates within. It is what got me here to Sedona. It is the motor that drives me forward and keeps me sane. It all started when Laura was diagnosed with cancer. We had no time to procrastinate (my usual first choice). We had so much to do, so little time and so much conflicting advice (most kindly and well intentioned, but pointing in so many directions). I just let my intuition be my guide. I call it my inner GPS (that would be Sat Nav if you live in the UK).
As writer Elizabeth Gilbert said in her Super Soul Sunday chat with Oprah a few weeks ago, great upheaval tests your mettle and you find out all at once what your strengths and weaknesses are. After 8 months of endless trials at the end of Laura’s life, this inner GPS has become like second nature to me now. It flows more and more easily. But still sometimes, steering by the light of the heart when you live alone can feel like being out in the middle of the ocean in a very small boat.